So you’re a single parent. Maybe you are divorced, or maybe your partner died of an unexpected illness or injury. Regardless of what has happened to you, there are ways to finding happiness as a single parent.
Being a single parent can be challenging, and finding happiness as a single mom is more difficult. It forces you to give up on the idea of finding happiness in someone else, so you must look for it elsewhere. When I was younger, I used to think that if only my dad had stuck around, maybe he could have given me some advice on how to do this. But now I realize that things other than dating advice will make you happy as a single parent.
First things first, don’t play the blame game. You are not your parent’s or your kids’ fault. Everything that happens is your responsibility, but blaming yourself for everything wrong in the world will only make you feel down about life and bring everyone else down with you. Instead of saying, “I messed up because I have to work so much,” try, “I can’t wait to get off of work so I can spend time with my kids.”
Get involved in the community.
Find support groups for families who have lost loved ones, meet new people at local universities and colleges (and their associated alumni associations), attend religious services if that helps with coping in finding happiness, single mom, etc.
Stay active.
Keep up your interests and hobbies even more than before. You’ll feel less alone if you also feel fulfilled on your own time, but don’t overdo it! Don’t let guilt force you into making yourself sick with activity, either. Set reasonable limits on what you can handle.
Don’t let yourself become isolated.
Even though you might feel like withdrawing from others, stay socially engaged. This will reduce feelings of loneliness and also help prevent depression, and help you achieve happiness, single parent.
If you’re feeling down, ask for help.
The risk-reward ratio is always in your favor when it comes to getting help for mental illness or stress.
Keep busy with the business of life.
Fill up your time with chores, errands, social engagements if those are a good fit for you; make sure you don’t neglect self-care! As a single parent, it’s easy for this to fall by the wayside as you rush about tending to everyone else’s needs. Set aside time each day just for yourself, even if it’s only for a few minutes spent in quiet meditation or prayer, and stick to it.
Remind yourself why you are doing this.
Single parenting is complicated stuff, but there are plenty of people who rely on you now! And you are strong enough to handle anything that comes your way. As a single parent, you’ll find happiness if you can remind yourself of all these things whenever you’re overwhelmed and thinking about giving up.
Remind yourself how blessed you are.
You might not have your lover or friend, but what do they really provide you? A few hours of happiness every couple of days?
A child provides you with love and fun 24/7! They don’t care if you need rest. They just want you around. Enjoy it, and let their happiness bring yours out even more than before!
Also, appreciate the parents in your life who took good care of you when you were younger. Whenever my daughter asks for candy, and I say no, I think back to all my parents who said no. Then I know what is right for her and let her have it.
Take lots of pictures!
These are memories that you’ll cherish forever once you look back on them. Ask your friends or family to take some shots of you with your kids doing certain activities or in certain places. You can also bring a camera along when you go out with your kid(s) so that any fun/special moments can be captured forever!
Being a single parent may seem like an uphill battle at first, but if you’re willing to work hard enough, it will soon become second nature. Keep these tips in mind whenever things get tough, and soon happiness will be all around you.
If these specific tips don’t help, remember that making friends with other parents (especially those whose kids are around your child/ren’s ages), joining online forums or local groups for single parents, family members, etc., reading self-help books, talking to counselors or therapists, and taking time to heal after a loss are all ways to find happiness as a single parent. The most important thing is for you to take care of yourself and recognize that even though this isn’t what you signed up for, it doesn’t make you any less of a good parent.
What are some of the ways you find happiness as a single parent? Comment below to share with our readers!
Xox Lisa
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